I couldn't help but think of one of my favorite books as a child I'll Love you Forever by Robert Munsch as I caught Joslyn unraveling our toilet paper in the bathroom. I don't know why but she really likes to explore and play in that room. I could get upset but I can't help but laugh and think how cute she is.
Well this has been a pretty emotional month for me. Okay not really, but kind of. This month has been the weaning month. I just didn't taper off like most people because Joslyn just liked nursing and so I just kept at it. But when I would ask how often my friends nursed at 10 months or 11 months old I was nursing much more than they were. Then the holidays came and I did not want to have to deal with her not nursing while traveling on a plane and being in a different house for a couple of weeks. So January became the month. Nursing for 13 months isn't so bad right?!
Well I decided to take one nursing session out at a time and leave the night time nursing to be the last one. Well Joslyn handled it like a pro until I took out the morning time. I did it on a Sunday which wasn't fun. Cory was at work and she was cranky... plus at that time she wasn't liking vitamin D milk too well. But as I pushed the milk she did great. TONIGHT is the first time we put her down with out nursing. I mean we have put her down before for the night with out nursing because of going on a date and the babysitter didn't have the goods, but I would always nurse her once I got back.
Last night I wanted it to be her last good nursing time.. even though she didn't realize it and wouldn't ever remember. But she fell asleep because I had to go pick up Cory from work. the Car always puts her to sleep. So once we got home I woke her up and let her nurse as long as she wants. Truth be told I did it for me.
When I first started to nurse I couldn't understand when my mom would ask me "Don't you just love nursing?" When I first started to nurse it was painful. I couldn't understand why anyone nursed their kids. I seriously would have quit if I didn't have a great husband and a mom to cheer me on. but after two 1/2 months of painful nursing it slowly started to be okay. So then a couple of months it was easy to nurse and then teeth came in and then it hurt again, or the one nigh that Joslyn decided to get nipple confusion because of me working and giving her a bottle. I got huge that night because she wouldn't nurse and it hurt. But now that I've gone through it all I'm glad I didn't quit. If I would have quit I wouldn't get to experience the learning process between a mom and child, or the special moments when you catch a cute side smile while nursing, or when they are just soo anxious to nurse just for comfort and only you can do that. I like to feel needed and to care for someone and Joslyn let me do that this past year and hopefully for a long time.
I know Cory felt a little left out in the beginning and wanted to be able to put Joslyn down for the night but couldn't really because well he didn't have what I have. So tonight I asked him if he wanted to do the honor. I didn't have to ask him twice. He is such a great dad and I hate to admit it but there is no way I could do this on my own or without him. I rely on him way too much. But we said prayers as a family and then Dad tucked Joslyn in her crib. I took a picture to remember that Jan. 16th was the first day of her starting her big girl stage.
Joslyn I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.